Movie

Signal One (1994)

Also known as Bullet Down Under, this messy thriller caught my eye during research, but the DVD copy had dreadful sound quality. Thankfully, a more watchable HD widescreen restoration is available on streaming sites, and the dialogue is audible even if the plot remains incomprehensible.

Martin Bullet (Christopher Atkins) is a conveniently named American cop who’s not as trigger-happy as his name might suggest. He has hated guns ever since he shot a kid during a bust gone wrong in the US. Now he’s in Australia and partnered with the aggressive Jack Moran (Mark ‘Jacko’ Jackson). Like every buddy cop thriller, the two men have a frosty relationship to begin with but come to trust one another.

Jack is on a personal manhunt for a mysterious underworld assassin who put his old partner in hospital, so the last thing he needs is a traumatised foreigner to babysit. Martin has moral support from his wife, who’s travelled with him to Sydney. She has no connection to the main plot, so it doesn’t take an action movie buff to deduce she’ll eventually wind up as a hostage.

The characters are mostly unsympathetic, especially the two brother criminals. One has serious mental health issues, and his supposedly smarter sibling is a nightclub owner who thinks it a good idea to play the cops off against gangsters. Scenes where they argue on the telephone are painful to watch, and it’s a relief when the far more interesting assassin finishes them off. For a filler subplot, a punk rock band uses the same warehouse hideout, which leads to a bizarre and pointless confrontation.

The killer works for an Asian gangster who imports fake boomerangs (yes, really) when he’s not dealing drugs. The boss shows up to issue orders a few times, only to disappear for the climax. Presumably he’s too smart to get involved directly, or the filmmakers realised the leather-clad antagonist is the best thing about this shambolic story.

Villainess

Toni (Virginia Hey)

The assassin is often seen at a distance, and her bandana disguise is effective enough that most viewers will assume the mystery figure dressed in black is male. Even though the billing implies a major role for Virginia Hey, the clever outfit choice sets up a great villainous reveal.

Knowing Bullet eventually teams up with Jack, it doesn’t bode well for the aging partner in the prologue. Especially when the cops respond to a murder scene and tail a black car to a deserted warehouse. There’s a dramatic chase, and the partner is badly injured. Then Jack does the hero thing and leaps onto the roof of the car. He doesn’t get a good look at the assassin, and his only clue – before he’s thrown into the ocean – is a T-shaped earring.

After that dramatic introduction, it’s a while before the second appearance. Following boring legwork, the heroes encounter the villainess (still thinking she’s a guy) at the crime lord’s hideout. After a pursuit on foot – the first opportunity for the assassin to show her physical prowess – Bullet corners the killer at a pier. Memories of the kid’s death haunt him so much he can’t squeeze the trigger, much to Jack’s disgust.

Bad luck catches up with the wannabe gangster brother, and the assassin crashes through a skylight. The shotgun-wielding target is outmatched, and she drowns him in a toilet. This badass certainly means business and wants the stolen drugs back, but a frantic search turns up nothing. The murderer likes theatrical death poses, and the “smart” brother discovers his sibling’s body strung up in a junkyard. With his mouth covered in lipstick.

Jack learns the assassin’s name – Tony – and goes to a gym, not realising it’s a setup. He eyes many male customers, which makes the regulars suspicious. Then, a beautiful blonde introduces herself and suggests Jack come over to her place. Someone should tell him Toni can be spelt that way and that the deadliest assassins are female.

The club owner kidnaps Bullet’s wife, leading to an apartment shootout. The secondary villain gets away, and Bullet focuses on saving his partner. Femme fatale Toni has her latest target alone and at her mercy. Jack is so infatuated with the naked woman that he never sees the knife in her hand. A violent mix of action and sex follows, but the picture is dark and grainy for the attack sequence.

The assassin badly wounds the cop and does her lipstick calling card thing, but first she gloats like all great female villains. The gangster confronts the assassin outside, but the strong woman tosses him onto a spiked railing fence. It’s the lipstick and psychotic laughter combo for you, mate.

Bullet arrives in time to save Jack, though he’s in no shape for police work. The setting for the finale is the warehouse, the docks, and finally a ship. Bullet pursues the villainess – who now has the drugs – and then it’s another test of his mettle. The psycho woman taunts Bullet, but what she did to Jack helps him overcome his fears. This time, he doesn’t hesitate to pull the trigger.

Honourable Mention: Masculine Names

Thrillkill (1984) – Adrian (Laura Robinson), Parrish (Colleen Embree)

Keeping with the tenuous theme of female villains with masculine names, the primary antagonist in this Canadian thriller is Adrian, a ruthless woman other people seem to trust. The movie is hard to find, but I sourced a DVD copy thanks to the Katrina’s Nightmare Theater release. Some scenes are dark, and there are many flickering transitions and residual static that suggest a VHS scan. Still, this old favourite earns an extended mention.

Female computer hacker Carly pulls off a 1980s variant of an electronic bank heist. Somehow she succeeds despite a pre-Internet dial-up connection and code written in BASIC. But a criminal gang wants the money and is quite prepared to kill for it. Most of the gangsters are idiots who act tough but end up suspecting each other instead of the obvious traitor in their midst.

Adrian – more proactive than her associates – murders Carly in a truly inventive kill sequence. The villainess records a computer message that counts down the remaining seconds. When the timer expires, Adrian strangles Carly with a necklace and smashes her head through a glass table. However, it turns out Carly didn’t trust her murderer since she left her own message… and no hint of where she stashed the stolen money.

Carly’s sister Bobbie is left to piece together the clues. Together with a detective, she learns where Carly hid the secret: the title VR computer game. This involves laser gun battles, a space-age corridor setting, and cat-suited enemies.

Gangsters bite the dust as Adrian and her mystery partner take them out. Female villain Parrish makes the mistake of threatening Adrian with her switchblade, so no surprise she winds up dead. This murder occurs in a curtained photo booth, with only deposited image strips to suggest what transpired.

Adrian is a far more intimidating foe, and even when she doesn’t speak, the smartly dressed woman projects a threat. It’s revealed the detective is actually a villain, the first of three baddies to play the fake cop trick on Bobbie. Once the heroine cracks the computer code, it’s time for a shootout in a convention centre. Good luck figuring out what happens with gloomy shots of people running down dark corridors.

The mystery villain, identifiable by his gold watch, is… some guy called Schofield, whom we’ve never seen before. After the generic baddie threatens Bobbie, the fake detective – who’s now switched sides – guns him down. The couple get all romantic, forgetting about Adrian. After she eliminates the last remaining gangster, it’s just her, Bobbie, the false cop, and an expendable security guard.

Adrian wounds her old partner but has to gloat instead of finishing him, which gives Bobbie the chance to grab the dead guard’s gun. Those computer games were ideal shooting practice, and while the dying villainess flees up a downward-moving escalator, she doesn’t make it far.